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Cee F. -  - The End of the Story

naked asian little girls My second book launches this week, almost exactly four years after the first one. I’ve lived with the characters in both books for half my life. What I originally intended to be a standalone novel became a three-book series, mostly by popular demand, which remains extremely humbling. But the fact is, despite taking long breaks where I write nothing (sometimes for months at a time,) the first draft of the third and final book is about five chapters from completion. The story that I started when I was fifteen is nearly over.

The fact is, it’s just that – a story. The characters don’t live anywhere but in my head and on paper. But I’ve struggled to write this third book, just like I’ve struggled with the other two. “I don’t understand what I find so difficult,” I sighed to my BFFFFF once. “I know what happens. Why can’t I put it on paper?”

“Maybe,” he mused, “you’re afraid to finish it, because you don’t know what you’ll do next.”

In the moment, I brushed him off. Afraid to finish my own book? Never. But lately, as the inevitable end of the whole story does approach, I admit that I find it hard to imagine what my life will look like when I am no longer writing about Amaia and Ilari. In fact, after I finish this series, I’m not sure I’ll ever write another book. And coming from someone who wrote their first novel-length story in eighth grade, that’s a serious statement.

I probably will write another book. But this is what I mean when I say that I find it hard to imagine what my life will look like after these three books are done – at this point, I can’t even begin to contemplate the prospect of embarking on another project that might take years to complete.

The fact is, I don’t have any answers. I don’t know what happens after book three and I suspect it’s going to be a long time before I do. So for the time being, I’m focussed on now – my new book is out, which I’ll be chatting a lot more about later this week, and my third book is still waiting to be finished. When I’m done with all of that, probably a few years from now, I can seriously contemplate what’s next – the possibilities are endless and I think, even though it will be a bit scary, the process of deciding what I want to do will actually be a big part of the fun.

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